...Oh lord, my "rear passage" is on fire. Yes, by rear passage I mean bum-bum. It feels as if it's been excreting razor blades the whole year through. That's how demoralising piles (haemorrhoids) can be! They are sick. In case you are wondering how my "ass" found itself in this predicament, no, I'm not pregnant. And I didn't engage in anal sex either. It's just my irate hormones conspiring against me. They don't want to see me happy. **I certainly wonder how sexually active male gays survive the torture...