YOU in my Dreams

Dreams...

What exactly defines a dream?
What important role do dreams have in our every day lives?
And what's the difference between a dream and this thing we call reality?

Despite the sad fact that these questions cause inexplicable havoc in my ever-inquiring mind, they still remain unanswered. Why why why??? Even Sigmund Freud's theory on dreams doesn't appease my monstrous curiosity. Instead, it leaves me with even more questions. Call it a pile of unanswered questions. It's frustrating!
Ok. I understand that some questions are never meant to be answered, but on this one I anguishly need answers. Sensible answers! At least an explanation that has a semblance of sense.

Why do we have dreams?

Perhaps you, on the other side, are questioning what brought this whole post on?

Well, I had YOU visiting my dreams again last night. That hasn't taken place for a long time. A very long time! The dream was so painfully vivid it took me the whole 24 hours to accept it was just a dream.

Here is what took place...

For some reason I had found myself in the beautiful "Peninsula of Fine Wines", if you know what I mean. I knew YOU lived there but truthfully didn't expect us to meet especially in such a vast place. But as I was leisurely strolling around the city to nowhere in my sweats and runners, there came a face my heart knew so well...
Your face.
For a minute I was transfixed, unable to move or think a thought. And when the shock had subsided, I had the most powerful urge to sprint straight into your familiar arms. YOU were at that moment coming towards me at a very slow pace with your head down. You hadn't noticed me yet. But before I could even think of getting my feet to move, I unexpectedly remembered all the hurt... all the pain... and all the fuckery that YOU and I had caused each other, and others. So I, with all the might, willed myself not to do the unthinkable. Instead I kept walking, hoping for the inescapable...
Then came a familiar velvet voice calling my name. Your voice. It sounded exactly the same. And the way YOU said my name... It was exactly the same way YOU always used to say it. I looked up and your captivating eyes instantly met mine. We stared at each other longingly for what seemed like a decade. Neither YOU nor I uttered a word. My heart was in the mean time threatening to jump out of my ribcage.
Before I knew it, reason and resistance had deserted me. I was left alone with YOU so close, and this gigantically hungry longing that was fiercely nagging and gnawing at my soul. I knew something had to be done. This hungry, angry feeling had to be taken care of right there and then. And the person with the right equipment to sort it out was right there with me. It was now or never. So I mustered sufficient courage and asked YOU to at give me a hug. Cheeky me! Lol Of course YOU hesitated. I immediately understood why and was about to continue with my stroll when YOU suddenly grabbed my hand pulled me back. The next second we were lovingly wrapped up in each other's arms, both of us in tears that had been long left unshed. We stayed like that for a long long time. Both of us wishing time would stand still for eternity. I could feel your strong heartbeat reverberating in my sternum. It produced the sweetest melody and my heart responded to it with a sensual dance that sent delicious shockwaves to the rest of my body. Our two hearts were finally together making the tastiest, most sugary love. Everything felt so right. Beautifully right in fact. Only it didn't feel right enough to be RIGHT. So I hesitantly pulled myself away from YOU. My YOU! It hurt!! Oh God, it hurt!!! It hurt so damn bad to pull away. For the second time my soul was flooded in tears. Tears full of pain. Tears filled with regret. But I was also smiling through them. I looked at your loving face and saw the reflection of what I was feeling staring back at me. You were also feeling the exact feeling I was feeling. Pain and regret... And then.. defeat. Somehow we both knew this was goodbye. We had finally accepted defeat and were ready to go on ahead in different directions towards different destinies. Suddenly it didn't hurt anymore.
I looked at YOU one last time as if memorize your face and silently took a step towards the opposite direction. I didn't look back. But I felt your eyes on me till I disappeared with the road...

And then I woke up.

And the sweetness of the sweetest hug from the dream still lingered on me...

Hurting me, but at the same time giving me pleasure of very high intensity.

Then the questions began...

Oh!

Dreams are a bum!!
A big bum!!!

But at least I know one thing...

That I have finally found what I have been searching for...

Have I, really?

Well, let me go back to my Australian Open tennis first...